I Am Clever


A Fine Line - Between Chaos and Creation

Everybody seems to think I'm lazy; I don't mind, I think they're crazy...

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Day Three Hundred Thirty-Five (Aka: In Which The Reader Learns 258 Facts)
So cool it hurts

Alternately: In which you learn more about Josee than you ever wanted or needed to know.

Caveat emptor definitely applies here: if you enter, be forewarned that this is an extremely long post.

It may seem incredibly narcissistic, but this was in response to a friend's challenge on Facebook:


So that spawned a post that (I swear) is longer than some novels.

If you read it/make it through, then good for you.  If you comment, then I suppose I'll give you a number if you want.

258 Facts About Me

1. I pace while I brush my teeth.  No idea why I do it, and I don’t tend to do it when I’m in a communal bathroom with others (e.g.: Quadra), but I do it all the time when I’m alone.

2. I sleep with my window open/blind up.  I’m not claustrophobic, or scared of the dark, and I can sleep with it down, but I feel iffy if I can’t have it open to see the outside.

3. My singing range encompasses the majority of tenor, all of alto, and 3/4 of soprano.

4. I got my wisdom teeth at 15/16 (and I still have them today).

5. I started reading at four.  My mom tells me I could read things like street signs and such, and her friends thought that she had coached me on how to repeat what was on the signs from memory/that I wasn’t really reading.

6. I don’t get headaches.  Never have, and I don’t know why.

7. I can’t crack my knuckles, but I can crack my pelvis.  And it’s super loud, too, which is just a little awkward when it happens in class/Wind Symphony.

8. I have a minor fear of calling people on the phone that I don’t know.  I mean, I know some people get apprehensive when cold-calling someone, but I literally have minor inner panic attacks.  I have to script out conversations for myself ahead of time (either in my head or on paper) so I won’t freak out and lose it when I actually bite the bullet and call.  (See also:  this is why I sometimes put off calling people for ages.)

9. If I write something down for myself to remember later on, I will remember it, regardless of whether I’ve looked at that note since I wrote it or not.

10. It’s more of a recent thing, but I can control whether I want to be ticklish or not.  A very useful skill to have.

11.  I have a weird hobby/obsession with buying notebooks.  No, really.  I own so many it’s not even funny.  Half of them, I’ve never even used.  And it’s not a collection thing, either; it’s more of a: I come across one, think “I could use this!” and I buy, then never end up using it.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

Don’t believe me?  See below:


That’s 32, right there, and I’m pretty sure I still missed some.

…I may have a slight problem.

12.  If I have no alibi prepared ahead of time, I literally can’t lie.  I, by default, will blurt out the truth.

13.  Counterpoint to above: if I have a pre-fabricated story in my mind, I have the world’s greatest not really poker face.

14. I’ve been dreaming up stories for as long as I can remember.  I only started writing some of them down once I turned 14, though.

15.  Sometimes, I think in French.  Then I regret that I can’t speak it better.

16. If I don’t get a chance to listen to, play, or sing music sometime during the day, I get depressed.

17. See above: Not a day goes by when I don’t sing to myself (or others) at least once.

18. Sometimes, I rage out at video games.

19. I composed some of my own songs when I was 12.  They weren’t very good songs. (Hey, I never said I was a genius.)

20. I once almost poisoned my brother.  (In my defense, it was an accident - he found a science experiment of mine in the fridge and was gonna eat it, as it kinda looked like pudding.  But really - what pudding is green?)

21. I’ve been on the radio before (when I was 12, my mom, I, a lady from my school, and the head of the BC Homeschool Association went on AM 980 to talk about homeschooling).

22. I still have glow in the dark stars on my walls/ceiling, because glow in the dark galaxies at night are the BEST THING EVER.

23. If it is hot food, I will burn my mouth on it.  Always.

24. Similarly, I will always find some way to end up with soap in my eyes when I shower.  No matter how careful I am.

25. When I was younger, I wanted to be a magician or a pirate when I grew up.

26. I used to wish that I had blue eyes, because I thought brown eyes were super ugly.

27. I also used to think that people saw the world in shades of whatever their eye colour was (like tinted sunglasses kind of idea).  Don’t judge me - I was like, 8 or so.

28. Even though I’m right-handed, I throw and brush my teeth with my left.  No idea why.

29. Grammar/spelling mistakes bother me more than they probably should.  Same for misuse of quotation marks.  THEY’RE NOT TO BE USED TO “EMPHASIZE” WORDS, PEOPLE.  It just makes you look like you’re being sarcastic.

30. I'm not a lot of fun to play board games with, as I can get pretty competitive.

31. I'm the oldest of 6 kids.

32. All my other siblings are brothers.

33. I can play 4 different instruments (piano, guitar, tenor sax, and oboe).

34. Mushrooms are the only food that I dislike both for texture and taste (everything else is just taste).

35. I've been wearing glasses since I was 5, and I can't see farther than a foot in front of my face without them on.

36. I have a knack for finding things people like, and I love getting people presents.

37. I’m a huge procrastinator.  Case in point - this list was intended to be done in June or so.  That being said, the list was never intended to be this long.

38. I have a thing for odd numbers.  I just like them a lot more than evens.

39. 7, 13, and 39 are my favourite numbers.

40. I’ve gotten more stitches than any of my brothers (surprisingly).

41. I’ve never broken a bone.

42. I'm a big fan of scarves. :D

43. Most people don’t know my full first name.

44. 95% of people can’t pronounce my name right the first time (when reading it), and usually have to ask me to spell it for them (if they’ve never seen it).

45. I love writing, yet hate English with a fiery, burning passion.  Explain that one.

46. My favourite instrument to play is the guitar.

47. I’ve been described as a loner sometimes because I’ll just sit and watch people on the sidelines; not talking to or hanging out with anyone.

48. When I read, I will totally zone out, and not be aware of my surroundings.  It’s been a point of hilarity/frustration in my family for a while.

49. Sometimes I just zone out in general and don’t register anything going on around me.

50. I have a habit of sticking pens in my hair (when it’s up) when I have nowhere else to put them, then I tend to forget that they’re there.

51. It bothers me when people call me short.

52. It also bothers me when people tell me I’m any less than 5’ 5”. Maybe it’s my odd number fascination in play?

53. I went through a phase when I was about 10 where I wanted to be called Aravis, like the Chronicles of Narnia character (The Horse and His Boy).

54. I’ve been playing music for 16 years now.

55. Some of the random things I do, I do just because I know that it’ll make people laugh.

56. I definitely was not this “out there” (see above) before I joined cadets.  I blame/credit certain friends of mine from there for doing this to me.

57. Before I joined cadets, I was the quintessential shy, quiet kid. It took 2 years in the program to snap me out of that.

58. I changed so much from my first year in cadets to the next, that people almost didn’t recognize me my second summer at Quadra.  Heck, I was so quiet/shy/wallflower my first summer, that some people didn’t remember me.  I had to give photographic evidence and relate some anecdotes that happened then to prove I was actually there.

59. Some of my favourite words include (but are not limited to): defenestrate, cornobble, sofa, rubbish, upholstery, drapes (like curtains), facilities, and ludicrous.

60. I’m a big tomboy (no surprise there).

61. I’ve had my Gr 10 piano pending for 4 years, now.  Unfortunately, going to university kinda put a stall on completing that.

62. I’m super messy outside of cadets, but when I’m at cadets I’m really organized.

63. My favourite colour is blue.

64. I abhor the colour pink.  Gender stereotypes can suck a lemon.

65. I enjoy watching My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.  Not just for the animation quality, the characters, or the storylines, but because it’s innocent and the world isn’t.  Sometimes it’s nice to just have a break from the crap that’s out there.

66. Some nicknames I’ve had are: Jared Cameron (The Dark Lawyer of Doom), Smitty McPatchington, Jojo (Potato), Genie, and Jaws.

67. Screennames I’ve used: BeatleFreak, Alexis Tygarr, Alec Towser, and SmittyJaws.

68. I love to read.

69. I’m really immature. <——— Heh heh heh.

70. I’m a huge sci-fi geek/nerd, and proud of it.

71. My favourite band is the Beatles.  I don’t think they were the most complex, or the be-all and end-all of classic rock, but they will always hold a special place in my heart for being what introduced me to that genre of music.

72. From the time I was little, I wanted to be just like my great-grandpa, who fought in both World Wars in the British Navy.

73. I can be super sarcastic sometimes, to the point of being scathing and rude.

74. My favourite superhero is Spiderman.  I felt like he was someone I could relate to.

75. My least favourite is Batman.  Dude’s a regular Joe with a) too much time on his hands, b) too much money on his hands, and c) a chip on his shoulder the size of the Western Hemisphere.  However, Adam West’s rendition of him is hilarious, and I will watch that.  Only reason why I’ll tolerate Iron Man over him is that Iron Man isn’t so angsty/dark.

76. I primarily sleep on my stomach.

77. I still hold my breath in tunnels, just 'cause.

78. My favourite book series is the Redwall series.

79. I still have yet to finish said series.  Oops.

80. My favourite food is pizza.  BEST STUFF IN THE WORLD.

81. If I wear bracelets with patterns, I’m super OCD about which direction the pattern is going.

82. I used to bite my nails.  Didn’t kick the habit until I was 16.

83. I love making really bad puns.  For instance: Haunted pancakes give me the crepes. *Bdun-tch*

84. Given the choice, I’d rather wear pants vs a skirt any day.

85. I’m 1/2 English (half of which is actually Scottish), and 1/2 French-Canadian.  There’s some Irish in there somewhere, too, but I can’t remember where.

86. If I take pens anywhere for writing purposes, I always carry at least 3.

87. Winter is my favourite season.

88. Because my name is so often mispronounced, I will respond to it even if people say it wrong.  Force of habit I’ve picked up over the years.

89. I have no food allergies.

90. I do, however, have horrible seasonal allergies.  The months of May/June are the banes of my existence.

91. I basically taught myself how to play guitar.  My mom taught me a few chords to get me started, but then I took it from there.

92. I took violin lessons for two years when I was younger, and to this day, I hold a little anger at Past Me for giving it up so soon.

93. I can knit, but I can’t crochet to save my life.

94. I don’t like cooking.  Not that I can’t do it (because I could if I tried); I just have no real interest in doing it.

95. Same with sewing (like, proper machine sewing).

96. I can’t type properly (used several different typing tutors when I was younger, but they all did nothing; however, I don’t “hunt and peck”), yet I type faster than some people I know who do type correctly.

97. I was in cadets for 5 1/2 years (I joined late).

98. I got two medals during my time in cadets: the 4 Year Long Service medal (with 5-Year bar), and the Royal Canadian Legion Medal of Excellence.

99. I have a slight addiction to buying geek shirts online.

100. My speaker system in my room is a set of old ghetto computer speakers (c. 2004.)


Still work to this day.

101. I’ve always wanted a dog or a cat, but I could never have one due to my dad’s allergies and asthma.

102. If I have a nightmare, it’s always about being chased.  It’s been that way as long as I can remember.  Here’s a variation of this theme: http://alec-towser.livejournal.com/39748.html

103. I don’t retain heat well.  I sleep with 6 layers, plus PJs, and I still get cold sometimes.

104. I love loopholes.  They form the basis of over half of my arguments.

105. Sometimes (okay, maybe a lot) I conduct to music that I’m listening to.

106. I’ve always had a fascination with learning Russian and Irish (or possibly Scots) Gaelic.

107. My favourite contemporary book is The Book of Awesome (and its subsequent two sequels), because it’s a great reminder of all that’s right with the world.

108. My favourite classic novels were/are Black Beauty, Little Women, and Little Men.

109. My favourite shape is a diamond.  It’s so pointy; gotta love it.

110. My favourite school subject was Socials.  However, I was so disappointed that I never got to study the World Wars in more detail.  I mean, really - who wants to hear about what happened on Canada’s home front?  Tell me about the soldiers and the battles!

111. My most prized possession is my treasure box, a gift from my grandma when I was 9-10. It's just a regular old jewelry box, but I've since filled it with many things that are important to me: military pins that belonged to my great-grandpa, dog tags from my grandma's old dogs, 70+ year old heirlooms, my boatswain's call, and many more things.

112. English is technically my second language - I only heard/spoke French until I was 3/4.

113. I’ve always wanted to go busking.

114. I want to release an album at some point in my life (or at least just record enough songs to be considered an album).

115. I have one tattoo; on my right leg.  I have plans to get more at some point, though.

116. I have 6 piercings; 3 in each earlobe.

117. Despite having so many ear piercings, I’ve never been a big earrings fan.

118. I am, however, a ring/bracelet fan.

119. I regularly wear 11 bracelets to work (Rainbow Loom. Visuals sell, people.)


120. I wear 5 rings.

121. I never used to wear a watch til I joined cadets.  Now I feel weird if I don’t wear one.

122. Schoolhouse Rock videos are legit the only reason I remember my times tables so well.  Same goes for grammar and science.

123. I still push crosswalk buttons repeatedly, as I feel it gives me an edge and makes the lights change faster.

124. I was raised Protestant Christian (Baptist), and I still am today.

125. I collect coins.  The pride of my collection is my Hitler Dollar.


U mad, bro?

126. I can’t keep a planner.  Well, keep it and use it, rather.  I start off school years using them, but after a week or two, I can’t keep it up.

127. The calendar hanging on the wall in my bedroom is from 2010.  I just can’t be bothered to replace it.

128. I secretly refer to my car as the CARDIS.

129. I still sleep with a blanket I got for my 6th birthday.

130. My handwriting has been compared to that of a doctors’; it’s that bad.

131. I find handwritten tests difficult, just because I have to consciously focus on slowing myself down so that I write legibly enough for others to be able to read properly.

132. I’ve always liked arts and crafts sorts of stuff.

133. I love rainy weather, which is fantastic, given where I live.

134. I also love snow, and I wish we got more of it here.

135. I don’t buy books very often, because I read so quickly.  Often, I’ll just sit in a bookstore and just read the whole book there.

136. When I was younger, I’d join the library’s summer reading club and finish all the required reading within a week.  The librarians would keep telling me I could only get one stamp a week, not all at once.

137. I own 7 ball caps, over half of which are duplicates, and I’ve never worn.

138. I have enough uniform parts to outfit at least six people.

139. I’ve read all the books on Star Wars and the Beatles at all the libraries I’m registered with, which makes me seem like a huge nerd when you realize that I have a card registered with 5 different systems here, which means there’s a great deal of libraries I’ve been to/had access to.

140. I'm firmly of the belief that mornings should not start until 10 AM.

141. I own actual lawn gnomes.  They were a birthday present for me from one of my staff cadets when I aged out, and I love them. :D


142. I’ve only ever completed one knitting project; my 4th Doctor scarf (AKA my SCARFDIS, Mark II).  Despite this, people keep telling me when I wear it that I’m a great knitter.

143. My guilty pleasure is watching Disney Channel sitcoms: Suite Life, JONAS, and Hannah Montana (JUST for Jackson and Rico), primarily.

144. I love cross-stitching.  There’s something therapeutic about it.

145. It took me over 6 years to finish this cross-stitch.


See 37.

146. I’ve never been overseas.

147. The farthest out of the country I’ve been is Point Roberts, WA, which is literally 5 minutes over the border.

148. I’ve wanted for a while to go to school and be a voice major, but be a tenor.  Just because I can.  However, my mom killed that dream and told me that that’s not done, which made me sad.  But I say, why not?  I could totally do it.

149. Though a lot of people assume that I have perfect pitch, I actually don't.  I have what I call "99% pitch" (technically it's "relevant pitch", but I think my name describes it more accurately), instead.  I have a great ear and can identify notes/chords/keys of songs correctly just by hearing them, but if I try to sing a note/song with no pitch given to relate it to, I'll generally end up slightly sharp or flat.

150.  At one point, I had considered both being a librarian or an audio engineer as jobs.

151. I can’t watch Big Bang Theory.  It pains me to do so, and makes me a bit angry.

152. I’m the man in my relationship with my boyfriend.

153. I don’t drink alcohol.  I mean, I’ve had a glass or two with dinner occasionally, but for the most part, I don’t care for it.  Give me pop/other beverages, any day.

154. Contrary to popular belief, my favourite pop is NOT Dr. Pepper.  It is, in fact, Root Beer (any kind will do).

155. I'm no good at Rubik's Cubes.  I managed to solve 2/3 of the layers of a standard 3x3 one once, but only by reading a list of algorithms telling me which way to turn and twist things.  Then I gave up.

156. I’m a supermassive douchebag, sometimes.

157. My favourite composer is Beethoven.  He has some of the most epic/awesome/beautiful music ever.

158. I have an LP collection.  Yes, actual records.  The things you find at garage sales/thrift stores.

159. I’m honestly not a narcissistic person, even if this list makes me seem like I am.

160. I’m surprised I’ve come up with this many facts about myself so far.  The things you discover.

161. I hate country music, and the vast majority of rap.

162. However, I will give any kind of music a listen before I completely discount it.

163. My guilty music pleasures are actually Eminem and Pitbull (only certain songs, though).

164. I’ve lived in the same city my entire life.

165. Same house, too.  Never have moved.

166. Same bedroom, too, now that I’ve been reminded.  Wow.  I really need more variety in my life.

167. It's taking me forever to format this list to look good on my LJ.

168. I can be very focused when I want to be, but easily distracted when I want to be, too.

169. I'm really good at slider puzzles.  Be it a standard "15 puzzle" layout or a Rush Hour type layout, I can usually have them solved in a matter of a couple of minutes at most.

170. I used to a be a super science-y nerd.  Case in point - I won first place in my age category at our Science Fair 4 years in a row.

171. The next number is out of order and not written by Josee.

173. The last fact is correct. Josee also didn’t write the last one.

172. My parents put me into ice-skating lessons when I was younger.  My brothers never got the same privilege.  The joys of being the oldest.

174. When I was younger, I wanted to take any of the following lessons: dance (any kind), horseback riding, figure skating, or gymnastics.  Unfortunately, we could never afford to put me into any of those, so I never got to.  My running joke is that I only joined cadets because it was free.

175. I love seeing before/after comparison pictures.

176. I can divide by zero. Extremely carefully.

177. I’m starting to run out of ideas.

178. I lied.

179. I’m getting married in April.

180. I love reading comic books.

181. I have three scars; one on my face from chicken pox when I was 4/5 (it’s really small), one on my chin from splitting it open when I was 14, and one on my chest from surgery this past June.

182. I have more scars than any of my brothers, surprisingly.

183. I graduated high school in June 2010.

184. Yes, I did get a diploma, despite being homeschooled.

185. Oh, yeah - I should mention that I was homeschooled from Grade 1 to Grade 12.

186. I can’t believe I didn’t have that fact on the list already.

187. My first time going to a public school was going to university.

188. I graduated from university in April 2012.

189. I currently hold a two-year Diploma in Music.

190. Despite having this wonderful certification, I work in retail at a toy store.

191. I still play with my former school’s Wind Symphony as a community member.

192. This is my fourth year playing with them (total: including time as a student).

193. I enjoy YTPs way too much.

194. The reason I carry my backpack/tote bag around all the time is that it negates the need for a purse.

195. I hate purses.

196. Have I mentioned how not-girly I am?

197. I’ve considered going back to school for Business or Accounting.

198. I’ve also flirted with the idea of self-studying (or actually taking courses) in automotive repair.

199. I have gotten into new TV shows just for actors I like. (They’ve been good shows, granted, but I got into them because I’m shallow. :P)

200. I kid - I’m not really shallow.  I just enjoy the sight of a good-looking celebrity face every so often.

201. I have several celebrity crushes, a lot of whom are men old enough to be my father (although, to be fair, the crush is on their younger selves).

202. Matthew Broderick, Pierce Brosnan, Johnny Depp…the list goes on.

203. I firmly believe that my multitool, a roll of duct tape, my freakin’ giant can of WD-40, and a can-do attitude will get me extremely far in life.

204. I CAN believe it’s not butter.

205. I have no idea how I’ve made it this far.  I honestly thought I’d have given up a long time ago.  Hence my working title “(Substantially Less Than) 258 Facts About Me”.

206. Unrelated: I rise to meet challenges fairly well.

207. I sing in the shower all the time.

208. And in the car.

209. And just about anywhere, actually.  I think I kind of covered this in 16 and 17.

210. Christmas is my favourite holiday.

211. I’ve always wanted to be in a musical.  Or panto.  Or both.

212. I’ve always been just the tiniest bit resentful at the fact that I missed out on opportunities to do theatre or band due to being homeschooled.

213. I have a certain fondness for the A Twisted Christmas album by Twisted Sister. (I blame YOU, Dad.)

214. I actually don’t mind doing the dishes.

215. I’ve picked up a habit lately of wearing ribbons from my store’s gift-wrapping station in my hair.  Everyone seems to like it, for some reason.


216. Everyone in my house/work seems to think I’m really tech-savvy, when really all it is is knowing when to Ctrl-Alt-Del, and having a good memory.

217. I don’t drink coffee.  I’ll drink cold Iced Capps and the like, but hate hot coffee.

218. I’m not a big fan of tea, either.  I basically only drink it when I’m sick.

219. I go Christmas shopping in October whenever possible.

220. I’m a sucker for stuffed animals.

221. I used to have a collection of stuffies when I was younger - over 30 at one time.   Mom wondered how I even fit in my bed.

222. I used to pretend I was a hobo all the time when I was 8 or so.  Straight up with the bag on the end of a stick and everything.  Dream big, kids.

223. I’ve never cared for dolls.

224. I lost my first tooth at 5, and I first noticed that it was loose while eating a poppyseed muffin.  The random things you remember.

225. I hate bananas.  I used to love them until I was about 7 or so, but now I detest them.

226. I can write poetry on command.  See this haiku I wrote today at work about a defective AquaBot:


(Ed. note: an edited version of this actually went on the defective product slip. XD)

227. Apparently my face/reactions to actions are enough incentive for others to do stuff to me.  Other people must think I'm funnier than I think I am.

228. I can be incredibly socially awkward when I want to be.

229. I don’t ever wear my watch tight enough, so it most often slides down so the watch face is on the inside of my wrist.

230. I still love to climb trees.

231. I stand by my argument that Weeping Angels would defeat the Silence any day.

232. Pirates over Ninjas, any day.

233. I work with a lady whose name is Twilight, and she won my respect by likening it to the pony, not the book series.

234. Nobody ever seems to think I was homeschooled.  Apparently I’m too well-adjusted.

235. I still have a rock in my possession that I stole commandeered from Quadra 3 1/2 years ago

236. I’ve never believed in Santa.

237. I may have believed in the Tooth Fairy, though. (don’t entirely recall)

238. My dad used to tell us that there was a Flakes of Ham Fairy, and instead of money, guess what she dropped off? (He totally did it sometimes, too - a can with garland taped on top)

239. One morning when I was 6 or so, I had put my tooth under my pillow for the Tooth Fairy/money.  In the morning, my tooth hadn’t been taken.  I went to ask my mom about it, and she told me to go back, make my bed/get dressed and stuff, and check again.  I did, and there was suddenly money there.  My mom was making muffins, my dad was at work, and none of my brothers were old enough to have done it.  I never did figure out who did it.

240. I love old black and white comedians, both silent and speaking.

241. The Marx Brothers are my favourite comedians.

242. Coffee doesn’t keep me awake at night.

243. Sugar doesn’t make me hyper.

244.  My dad has just blockaded my door with a cardboard Great Wall of China.

245. Garfield is my favourite comic strip.

246. If I could get paid full-time for working with cadets, I’d jump on that opportunity in a heartbeat.

247. I’ve released a single - a cover of Bob Dylan’s “Don’t Think Twice, It’s Alright”.

248. I enjoy different time period shows on TV, as opposed to cop shows.

249. I’m a bit amused at the fact that I have a huge super warm scarf, and it barely even so much as snows here. sadface.jpg

250. I’m not an Apple fanboy, despite what a lot of people seem to think.

251. The only reason I own a Macbook is that I got it for dirt cheap.

252. At some point in my mortal life, I will wear your granddad’s clothes, and I will indeed look incredible.

253. If you’ve read this far, then I applaud you.

254. I want to visit Europe someday; specifically, the UK, France, and Italy.

255. I’m a slightly famous one-hit-wonder on YouTube.

256. I’ve worked on completing this list for an entire 6 days. (Tuesday Nov 26 started)

257. It's now December 30, and I'm still tweaking the list here and there, because SOME PEOPLE weren't entirely satisfied with it.

258. Hannah Adam is the worst person ever. And her mother wears combat boots. [Note: The second half of this was added by my brother.  Just thought I should mention.  I bear no ill will towards Hannah's mother.]

I can't believe I just did that.  ...Hopefully you enjoyed it?  Or at least aren't too weirded out/thinking I'm a super arrogant douche, now?

  • 1
Hahahahahaaa :D I loooooveee youuuuu

  • 1

Log in

No account? Create an account